Comin' At Ya With The Blah Blah Blah

How am I? Oh well I have been inside with 3 kids for pretty much three days straight that's how. EXCEPT for awhile ago when I had to go out & RE-shovel my parking space. Why you ask? Because a plow truck had to unbury a stuck Oil tanker truck that got stuck on the corner of the alley & my street. Unburying the truck meant adding about 18 inches of snow to my already once cleared spot.

Not happy.

B who I love to pieces is driving me completely & totally batshit crazy(er?). Why? Why? I'll tell you.

Her birthday is in June & she has been promised a trip to NYC to the American Girl Doll Store. You know where everything is HELLA expensive?  They have a "deal" where for $220ish bucks you go, your kid gets a doll, a $120 shopping spree & then lunch in the cafe.

Now multiply that times three because I have 3 girls total.  Okay, that is just bad expensive but still, we will do it or else. So in the meantime B gets American Girl catalogs & this is where the torture totally comes in. She has spent this entire blizzard carrying around every single catalog & RUMINATING over which doll combo to get.

2 days ago it sounded something like this:

B: I've made up my mind. I want to get Rebecca.

Me: Are you sure, you want Rebecca?

B: Yeah it's Kit, er, I mean Rebecca.

Emmy: I thought you wanted Josephina.

Maya: You said you wanted the new Laney 5 minutes ago.

Repeat that 100 million times an hour spliced with, "Do you like this dress or that...this purse or that bag...should I get her a puppy...?"

ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

I put her on the phone with my sister, "B talk to Kiki, tell her about the American Girl Dolls!!!"

I FORGOT she was on the phone. 20 minutes later she handed me the phone with my warrior princess sister STILL on the other end. Sounding exhausted Kiki says, "OMG whyyyyyyyy would you do that to me???"

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I'm supposed to have 4 days of job retraining this week. Where? Smack in the middle of NOWHERE. Seriously.  Out in the country in a foot & a half of snow & then,  the kicker- I'll be gps -ing the boonies.

Really?????

In snow like this???

Do you really think I'll be doing that???

Yeah, me neither.

Shitbuckets.

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Did I mention that I have spent 24 hours completely & totally OUT of coffee? Can ya believe that? And as I hauled my ass thru snow that was falling sideways to buy more WAIT! First let me tell you that an umberella might have helped which is precisely why one of the little fukcers that came to my door asking to shovel STOLE mine from the hook on my mailbox. So no umberella. No plowed streets. Blinding snow. Little me trudging along in the name of coffee...THERE WAS NO COFFEE! Seriously. Out of coffee & bread. Then I got to trudge home with my caffeine headache fully intact.

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You're jealous of my weekend thusfar, admit it.