Seperation Anxiety Redo

Way long ago (Okay, like 2 years ago), Miss B HATED leaving me. Every morning before Preschool she would cry. EVERY morning from Sept.-February until one day it just stopped. She never fought me about going to school, it was just an "I'm going to miss you" meltdown. I was told back then that the minute she walked into school she dried her tears and was Happy B. I truly believed that. Kindergarten came and went with not a single problem. Well, except for the day when "Mean, Smelly Nolan" LIED about her talking in the hallway & then gave her a parking ticket so she ended up with her name on the stop sign and didn't get her daily sticker. "BUT HE LIED MOM I WASN'T CHATTY! I'VE BEEN CHATTY THOSE OTHER TIMES BUT I WAS NOT CHATTY TODAY!!!" That was the only dilemma last year. This year, first grade has been a piece of cake. She is doing fab, has a BFF, everyone loves her, her teacher is great...I'm in the classroom a lot as a homeroom mother...I could go on forever with all the reasons of why this year is so good. Until yesterday. Yesterday we hit a speed bump while driving 60MPH. Yesterday she uttered the dreaded statement, "Mom, I think I'm going to miss you too much when I go to school." Dreaded because those exact words brought a lot of greif two years ago. I knew we were in deep shit again. By bedtime she was crying & hyperventilating last night. She spent so much time on winter break with me that she now hates to leave me. I love my sweet B to pieces. I'd keep her in my pocket if I could so seeing her so upset crushes me. She fell asleep on my lap last night & I prayed this morning she would have cried it out & somehow she'd be ok.

No such luck.

I took one look at her & she started crying. She cryed up until we left the house then cried on her way to school. I wrote Tracy (her teacher) a note explaining the situation only to realize Tracy wasn't teaching today. She was running her kids to doctors appts so the comfort zone of her warm & fuzzy teacher with 4 kids under age 8 at home went out the window. B did ok. Made it home & told me several times that she missed me & loved me with a big smile. I *hoped* we were ok.

Thought I'd pad the deck and made her favorite dinner, favorite snack, we then headed for the couch to read books & cuddle. Inching towards bedtime she started crying all over again. Gut wrenching, can't breath kind of tears. "But I'm going to miss you..."

UGH. I felt SO bad today, all day that I couldn't wait to pick her up. I am used to her being happy and when she's not my instinct is to scoop her up and hold her til its fixed. This is not one of those things I can do that with. Tomorrow she'll get up & maybe she'll be ok but probably not. Either way, we have to go to school and go thru the motions until she forgets that its a problem. Until she is so distracted that she forgets to miss me so terribly. I pray that happens soon. In the meantime we're reverting back to preschool things that helped. She wears my necklace because she has to give it back so I have to pick her up soon. I'm going to send Tracy an email in a minute to let her know what is happening. I can troubleshoot a bit but this will need to kind of fix itself. In the meantime I'll be spending my school hours counting down to the pick up time because as much as B misses me, when she's struggling, I miss her more.

Bug-ology

So the new school year is off to a flying start. My oldest is doing okay. My seven year old seems to have retained every bit of everything she learned last year and is spitting it out into this years work with ease. My little one, Miss B. started first grade this year. She is now being introduced to all day schedules, vocabulary words, spelling tests and reading out loud on a daily basis. In other words, the tough stuff! REAL school! I requested to be a homeroom mother for Miss B's class. I thought it would help her with the big changes and I really wanted to do something extra for her. Last year was filled with struggle for her sisters. One struggled with school while the other battled a six month illness that disrupted out lives on a daily basis. Both of these situations required extra attention and all the while, Miss B was thriving. I figure fair is fair, now it's her turn for something extra.

So I waited. Crossed fingers. Wondered who I'd have to bribe or knock off to get a coveted homeroom mother spot. I WANT to be in that classroom. I WANT to positively influence these kids. That should count for something and ultimately, it did. I nabbed a spot. I attended Back To School night and signed up for what is known as Friday Families- or something like that. In a nutshell, a different parent comes into the classroom on the first Friday of each month to do something. An art project, storytime, whatever. Entertain them, bring a snack and your a godess. I signed up for February. Why February? My girls love Valentine's Day so I knew Miss B would want me there to do something special for that holiday.

A few days after Back to school Night I asked Miss B's teacher if she wanted me to come in sooner. I realized not many appeared to be signing up so I figured I could help out before February, right?! As luck would have it she does need someone, for October. She asked me to think it over and think I did. Okay, I can do something for Halloween. Read a Halloween story, make cool cupcakes. Easy. Miss B will be happy, her teacher will not have to wait until November for a parent to show up and I'll be comfortable with this group of kids early in the year. Good plan.

The next day as I'm picking up Miss B I tell her teacher I'm in. She was thrilled. Thrilled. So was I until this sentence fell out of her mouth:

Great! We are studying bugs and that is the last full day before our Bug Hunt field trip so if you can do something on bugs it would be great!

Oh. Kay. Bugs. Bugs?! I have three girls and for the most part we are in agreement, bugs are for "smelly boys" (a phrase coined early on by Miss B). I walked away from the school thinking, "Oh crap!! Bugs!! Yuck! I can't..." Knowing all the while that I have to pull this off because I can not let Miss B or her teacher down. The snack is easy. Dirt cups. Pudding cups with crushed Oreos and a gummy worm on top. As for the activity or story, I'm still at a loss. Google, Barnes and Noble and Borders all will be my best pals until I figure it out and boy do I need to figure it out soon! I have five days to put something together to throw down the first grade parental gauntlet. More importantly, I need to help make 20 six year old kids glad that they came to school that day.

I'm studying my "Bug-ology" as Miss B calls it, reminding myself that help is doing what is requested, not just doing what you THINK is a good idea!