2 toddlers all accessories & diva necessities included. If you live out of state I'll throw in their father & 3 cats as extra incentive.
I didn't do any yoga yet today. I didn't go for a run early this morning. Yet I somehow managed to pull an ASS muscle. Shut up, it's not that funny.
Moments that have made me quite literally think, "What the fcuk?!" today...
Catching Bridget on all 4's, face down drinking from the cats water dish.
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Emmy hitting on not one but TWO guys in their early twenties. "Hi, I'm Em-A-Wee what's your name??"
Dude 1:"Hi Emily, I'm Brandon & this is Matt!"
Em:"Nice to meet ya is that your car?"
Dude 2: "Yep(laughing) it is Emily."
Em: "Ohhhhh, COOL! I like shinies!"
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Some bald, hot although short 25 year oldish guy that tried to pick me up...as I juggled all 3 kids this morning. "Hi, wow are your hands full! You don't look like you've had any kids at all you're so tiny...blah blah blah..."
As Em melted down over the M&M's I refused to buy 5 minutes earlier. I looked at this dude who was a good decade younger than me in complete disbelief. Like as if I woke from a deep sleep & found him snorting a line of coke off my stomach or something. Who are you & why aren't you running like hell in the other direction???? Don't you HEAR these kids??? Ack.
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Maybe Em could give me some lessons on flirting. Some guys just dig cute kids. And the short thing kills me. I wish it wasn't such a deal breaker for me. I really am that shallow...
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